Aadat (Habit)

MJ
2 min readJan 12, 2024

Aadat is an artwork created in 2021 that revolves around the theme of making it a habit of hurting ourselves

Description- A crown we seek,
believing it’s what we want.
It gets us love and respect,
a scary voice daunts.
That voice wants to see the gems,
we are capable to exhibit,
We find a way- we hurt, we gain
sometimes WIN sometimes fail.
A pattern, yes we create.
With a time not enough to self reflect,
maybe we aren’t puppet to world but to ourselves.
The source of the fear we always neglect,
Alas, the scary voice was ours, we didn’t expect.

We live in a world where our worth is measured at every step we take. We not only want to be part of it but also be appreciated for what we are capable to add. We want to be loved and respected and the way to get that is through winning- that’s what we keep believing or are made to believe.

We keep telling ourselves to achieve this and everyone will love you, to create that and everyone will value you. The voice keeps asking for more, keeps getting greedier, not satisfied with those same awards anymore, it wants you to be more capable, to do better.

In this pursuit of seeking affection from an unknown place, we keep hurting ourselves until we win a battle of our own creation. We lose, we blame our efforts and dedication. We push ourselves more, we lose more eh. And end up creating a cycle of exhaustion and self criticism

There is not enough time to waste on our feelings, not enough to think we need a break. We fail to learn that hurting ourselves is not the only way to win. Our mirror is too broken to show us the beautiful person we are.

We don’t try to understand why we are doing what we are doing, and keep going with “that's what I should do”

Do we love what we are doing? Do we feel happy?

This piece tries to show how our soul exhausts itself trying to always perform. How no achievement brings a smile anymore, and it becomes about ‘what's next’. How we are always worried about who is watching us and what they might think of us, and how we associate other’s love towards us based on our success and failure.

We become puppet to our own thoughts. A part of us wants to escape but it can’t afford the guilt of a break. No reason seems good enough to pause.

--

--